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President Donald Trump left Brownsville Valley Baptist Medical Center early Monday morning under the cover of darkness and departed from Brownsville/South Padre Island International Airport on Air Force One at 5:45 for Washington D.C. and Walter Reed Medical Center. He was later released from the hospital in the afternoon. He is under 24/7 care at The White House as he struggles with a serious case of COVID and is in an extreme infectious stage although he continues to disdain the use of a mask and social distancing.

Dr. Polyphemous Pangloss, the physician who attended Trump during his approximate two-day stay on the border, opposed the unexpected transfer. Dr. Pangloss argued that the president is ill and the cocktail of drugs that he is ingesting require close monitoring. He noted that the President was breathing heavily which was clearly visible when Trump stood on a White House balcony--waving and saluting the crowd during his Benito Mussolini moment-- and was heaving as these simple hand gestures seemed to fatigue him.

"The decision was made late Sunday night," said Dr. Pangloss. "When he heard that Kayleigh Mcenany, his press secretary, had been diagnosed with Coronavirus, he became agitated and started muttering, 'My little bird has fallen from the tree and I'm her nest. She has a broken wing and needs me at her side so she can fly again.'

"The other factor, the protestors who call themselves Voices for the Dead, were growing outside the hospital as more and more sympathizers of the 2,500 who have died in the Rio Grande Valley due to Coronavirus were arriving hourly and their chorus was gathering more and more force as they continued with their chant, 'Asesino! We're not rapists! Asesino! We're not rapists! Pay back is a bitch, ain't it, puto!' There was an increasing fear among the hospital's administrators that there might be a mass storming of the building and the president dragged from his bed. I observed them from the Yturria Suite's window where the president was staying and I had no doubts that this grieving assemblage wanted its pound of flesh.

"The president's security team decided that it was too dangerous to move him," continued Pangloss. "There were too many people surrounding the hospital and the situation was volatile. They anticipated that the crowd would diminish during the night and it would be safer to undertake the operation at dawn. Since we have had six COVID deaths during the president's recuperation, hearses have been arriving and leaving with regularity from the complex's rear entrance without any interference. 

"At 4:30 a.m. we awakened the president. He had showered the previously night, so we quickly dressed him. Even though we had administered him the maximum dosage of steroids, he demanded another dose and the head of his security ordered that I comply with the president's wishes. After I injected him, we placed him on a gurney and covered him with a sheet. We took the rear elevator. We wanted to keep the staff ignorant for fear someone might inform a contact on the street and alert the protestors that the president was in transit. Everything went smoothly. We placed him in a waiting hearse and the vehicle drove away without incident. At the airport we loaded him on to Air Force One where two Walter Reed doctors relieved me of my duties.

"I can say that we did everything we could for the president and he left in better shape than he arrived, but I can say that it is a relief to be relieved of the responsibility. You ask my impression of the president. I wish he would act with one-tenth of the responsibility in dealing with this pandemic as we exhibited in treating him. As a person, I find him reprehensible. I was doing my rounds when I surprised him Sunday night in his room alone. He was masturbating watching Stormy Daniels on his lap top getting creampied by six different guys. When he saw the look of revulsion on my face, he snapped, 'I paid this bitch $150,000 and I want my money's worth!' Will I vote for him? He did make a difference in my taxes last year, but no amount of money could ever convince me to vote for that stooge again. I'm taking Trump's own advice. I'm forwarding my mail-in vote and then I'm going to the polls November 3rd and voting again. No amount of physical sickness can compare to the mental disorder that this madman is suffering."