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The Murphy Report sent the Baker Boys, the famed investigative team, to ascertain COVID's current status. Billy, the more talkative of the twins, presented managing editor Scott Steinbeck with the latest daily chart.
"The numbers remain ominous," he said. "We have well over two million cases and 118,000 deaths nationally, 90,000 cases and 2,000 deaths in Texas and more than 1,100 cases and 44 deaths in Cameron County. In the state and county cases are spiking. There were 2,000 new cases in Texas yesterday and 57 new cases in Cameron County. These are huge increases."
"What are the causes of these grave stats?" asked Steinbeck.
"It begins at the top," answered the Private Eye while his brother Bobby stood silently at his side. "Our president can't handle evidence if it doesn't coincide with his fictional reality. News is a hoax. Facts are false. And people, no different than Germans following Hitler, take him at his word and act accordingly."
"Are you saying he in no better than a Nazi?"
"Outside the sad truth that he is the Neo-Nazi movement's honorary Fuhrer, he flaunts his careless behavior that can only exacerbate the contagion. He doesn't wear a mask; he disdains social distancing; and he wants to hold campaign rallies packed to the rafters with his rednecks."
"How does his behavior filter down to us?"
"My brother and I took a tour this weekend to observe for ourselves if our fellow citizens were taking Coronavirus seriously. They aren't. We drove to the Island and stopped at Louie's Backyard. The joint was packed with families and people of all ages and nobody was wearing a mask. I couldn't believe my eyes. In my cursory view these individuals appeared to be educated and they were ignoring the most basic precautions."
"Where else did you go?" pursued Steinbeck.
"On our return from the Island, we stopped at The Broken Sprocket. You would have thought it was a graduation reunion. Again, nobody was wearing masks and handshakes, kisses and hugs were the rule rather than the exception."
"Did you venture across the border?"
"No, but I'm seeing a chick from Matamoros. I haven't seen her in two weeks. The city is in lockdown. The authorities are so distressed about getting the virus under control that motorists can only drive on certain days based on their license plates. She told me that the populace is taking the threat seriously, but living conditions are Third-World for thousands and everyone is fearing the worst."
"Mayor Mendez is pulling out his hair. He can't believe that his fellow denizens are living high on the hog as if they were on vacation, but the numbers of positive results are skyrocketing and he fears Father's Day will precipitate another spike," lamented Steinbeck. "Are we seeing any fallout from the flourishing figures?"
"There are some rumors sizzling at Texas Roadhouse that have found their way onto Facebook and the blogs," answered Billy. "There are employees who work even though they are suffering from flu-like symptoms and remain on the job until the county proves they are COVID infected. And that damn joint is packed."
"Are there other worrisome observations that you have noted?"
"Both The Vermillion and The Library have closed temporarily," replied Billy. "Officially, they have declared they are disinfecting their restaurants, which leads me to believe they are not reporting to the public that they have experienced positive cases."
"Wow! Anything else?"
"Max Maxwell was saying that the BISD had closed down its summer athletic activities until the middle of July."
"I was talking to Dr. Polyphemous Pangloss and you would think he was a mummy he has himself so tightly wrapped. He says that we are underestimating that there is a worst case scenario waiting to bushwhack us. We aren't only cutting our own throats if we persist in rejecting common sense in our approach to this deadly plague, but with no vaccine and no adequate testing, we are wading into unchartered waters filled with bloodthirsty sharks anticipating a human feeding frenzy."
"I spoke with a number of physicians and they all agreed that we're playing with fire, but with a president who grabs pussy whenever the urge deranges him and brags he could kill anyone he wants on Fifth Avenue without facing charges, we could soon find ourselves in the middle of a conflagration with an inflammatory Trump dousing the flames in gas as part of his strategy to extinguish the fire."
"What are the causes of these grave stats?" asked Steinbeck.
"It begins at the top," answered the Private Eye while his brother Bobby stood silently at his side. "Our president can't handle evidence if it doesn't coincide with his fictional reality. News is a hoax. Facts are false. And people, no different than Germans following Hitler, take him at his word and act accordingly."
"Are you saying he in no better than a Nazi?"
"Outside the sad truth that he is the Neo-Nazi movement's honorary Fuhrer, he flaunts his careless behavior that can only exacerbate the contagion. He doesn't wear a mask; he disdains social distancing; and he wants to hold campaign rallies packed to the rafters with his rednecks."
"How does his behavior filter down to us?"
"My brother and I took a tour this weekend to observe for ourselves if our fellow citizens were taking Coronavirus seriously. They aren't. We drove to the Island and stopped at Louie's Backyard. The joint was packed with families and people of all ages and nobody was wearing a mask. I couldn't believe my eyes. In my cursory view these individuals appeared to be educated and they were ignoring the most basic precautions."
"Where else did you go?" pursued Steinbeck.
"On our return from the Island, we stopped at The Broken Sprocket. You would have thought it was a graduation reunion. Again, nobody was wearing masks and handshakes, kisses and hugs were the rule rather than the exception."
"Did you venture across the border?"
"No, but I'm seeing a chick from Matamoros. I haven't seen her in two weeks. The city is in lockdown. The authorities are so distressed about getting the virus under control that motorists can only drive on certain days based on their license plates. She told me that the populace is taking the threat seriously, but living conditions are Third-World for thousands and everyone is fearing the worst."
"Mayor Mendez is pulling out his hair. He can't believe that his fellow denizens are living high on the hog as if they were on vacation, but the numbers of positive results are skyrocketing and he fears Father's Day will precipitate another spike," lamented Steinbeck. "Are we seeing any fallout from the flourishing figures?"
"There are some rumors sizzling at Texas Roadhouse that have found their way onto Facebook and the blogs," answered Billy. "There are employees who work even though they are suffering from flu-like symptoms and remain on the job until the county proves they are COVID infected. And that damn joint is packed."
"Are there other worrisome observations that you have noted?"
"Both The Vermillion and The Library have closed temporarily," replied Billy. "Officially, they have declared they are disinfecting their restaurants, which leads me to believe they are not reporting to the public that they have experienced positive cases."
"Wow! Anything else?"
"Max Maxwell was saying that the BISD had closed down its summer athletic activities until the middle of July."
"I was talking to Dr. Polyphemous Pangloss and you would think he was a mummy he has himself so tightly wrapped. He says that we are underestimating that there is a worst case scenario waiting to bushwhack us. We aren't only cutting our own throats if we persist in rejecting common sense in our approach to this deadly plague, but with no vaccine and no adequate testing, we are wading into unchartered waters filled with bloodthirsty sharks anticipating a human feeding frenzy."
"I spoke with a number of physicians and they all agreed that we're playing with fire, but with a president who grabs pussy whenever the urge deranges him and brags he could kill anyone he wants on Fifth Avenue without facing charges, we could soon find ourselves in the middle of a conflagration with an inflammatory Trump dousing the flames in gas as part of his strategy to extinguish the fire."
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